The Hurt over Loss

Hello all,

I seem to be a little down and feeling blue. 2 Years ago in this very month, I lost my dad. I knew this was coming and dreaded this month ever since my dad's birthday past on the 28th of last month! I know that as time go by, wounds should begin to heal, but does anybody know how much time it will take? I really wonder, am I going to feel like the world is over, and that the center of my universe is gone forever or is this how hurt over loss is? Time is trully an illusion by which all things on this earth is damned, or cursed to come to its bitter end, one way or another; only to leave the left-over loved ones in hurt and pain for eternity. If there is a better way to deal with loss, I think now is a great time to tell me because I really feel as though I'm re-living a nightmare that just won't end without me, or someone else dying in the process! I'm sorry that this isn't my normal mode of tone or even the jovial-self I can be, but I'm hurting and want to share my feelings with you all in hopes that same hurt doesn't be-fall someone else. For two years, I've been trying to hold it together and not lose it on my job, and just tell everyone to JUST go to Hell and call it a day, but I know my dad would scream at me from the otherside! I'm JUST hurt, and still a little shocked that he's actually gone. I kind of still expect to see his face when I walk through the door back home! How in the hell can he be dead, and how the hell am I gonna get through this without losing a piece of my heart in the process? I guess only time can tell, and only God can help us... This is a very hard time and I want all of you to pray that we, my family and I, make it through this tough time in our lives!

Thank you all for listening and sharing with me!

With Love,
Ken