Feeling and Seeing Trouble Before, and After it Starts!

Hey Yal,

As you all know, or may know, I've had a couple of family issues that kept me from blogging and getting the word out about how things are going! Now to tell the truth, I got sloppy, lazy and thought of this as a chore, and not really put forth more effort than I really should have to keep going at it... SORRY folks! But, since this is a new year, and I'm trying to do better at Doing, and NOT just saying that I'm gonna DO! I feel that I can take my time and not rush into anything too fast now... SOOOOOOOO, Here goes!!!!

In November, If I didn't tell this story, I'll tell it again to re-aquaint us with all the great details. My cousin fell ill and had to be institutionalized for a short time, Very Brief time rather! He began a downward spiral into this bottom-less pit of pain and misery that many of us don't come back from! To further explain this tale, my cousin experimented with a couple of drugs that messed up his mind. As a result of the drugs, he lost it! His mind was so far gone that he was on a level of his own with shear craziness! Now, here's where I come in... That morning I awoke with Lady Ga Ga in my head singing Paparazzi! At the time, I didn't quite know what the Hell was happening and what was really going on, but I knew it had something to do with my cousin and his friend. It wasn't until I got to the hospital where my cousin was being held that I realized that he, and his friend was up all night acting and singing Lady Ga Ga songs, and flipping the FUCK out, literally! Now, the cousin's friend is just fine, and my cousin is held in the institution losing his DAMN mind! All of this was from drugs he took, and the chasers he mixed with the drugs. As we sat at the hospital waiting for word from the nurses, or anyone that could give us some absolution that he'd be okay, my mind began to wander and backtrack the events that possibly led him to the hospital. I began to see the dancing, singing, and playing around the night before, and I also saw that he kept bothering his sleeping boyfriend! My good ole' cousin wanted his boyfriend to get up and play with them, dancing, singing, and such... Then, my mind flashed to the events of that morning, before the police arrived, and hauled him to the back of the patrol car for showing out - in front of the PO-PO, then to an ambulance for treatment at the local mental facility. Now, at the hospital again, we wait as the psychiatrist tell us "NOT" to be an enabler for my cousin and start telling him, NO! We should mean what we say, and not give in to his tandrums if we trully want him to get better! At that time, I thought and kinda read her gestures as she stood there telling us about this 22-something year old-ass, grown MUTHAFUCKA, that's clearly making his own decisions as to how he wants to live his life! The anger was there, but I didn't let her have it! Instead, I cried, because she told us that we couldn't see him for 24 hours, and there was nothing that I could possibly do to fix this besides pray, and wait on the LORD to deliver us from this craziness that's taken over our lives, at this point and time! Hurt and sad, YES!!! As the next morning approaches, my dreams have alerted me that my cousin has been released from the hospital, and is on his way home in his little black car! My mom called and woke me up as I told her exactly, "Ma, dat boy done been released and is in his car heading back home...!" My mom asked how I knew and I told her, "I just know!" Of course, Later on that night, when my sister and I left the house to check on him, I learned just that and more. Everything I said he did, the night before, was true, and how he acted with the police was true also! In the end, my cousin is a lucky man to be alive, and just around the corner, we'll see how lucky and blessed he trully is!

...Nite all!